Be honest with yourself about what your toxic traits are.
Having an awareness and being honest about when you’re being toxic is an important first step for change. The more aware you are, the better your chances of making active change. Let’s say for example that one of your toxic traits is gossiping about others, and maybe you have done it for so long that you don’t even realize when you’re doing it. If you find yourself gossiping about someone and you’re able to say in that moment “I’m being toxic right now”, you immediately give yourself the opportunity to stop.
Examine and challenge your negative core beliefs.
Core beliefs are the central ideas that we have about ourselves and the world around us. Negative core beliefs have a huge influence on what we do, how we feel, and what we think. One example of a negative core belief is “I can’t trust others”. If this is a belief that you have deep-down, then you may push people away or assume the worst in people. You could challenge this belief by; thinking of times that someone in your life proved to be trustworthy, thinking about how this belief has negatively affected your relationships, and thinking about what relationships could be like if you chose to adopt a healthier belief.
Write affirmations that reflect the healthy traits you aspire to have.
I am a huge believer in writing out affirmations as a means of manifesting. If one of your toxic traits is being passive aggressive, then write “I am an assertive communicator” or “I am comfortable with speaking up”. Don’t forget to post your affirmations somewhere you can see them daily.
Consider talking to a therapist or life coach.
A therapist or life coach is someone that can provide support, encouragement, and guidance on your journey to healthy change. Making change all on your own could possibly be overwhelming, so it’s nice to have someone outside of your friends and family to get assistance from.
Surround yourself with people who are also working toward healthy change.
We all have the capacity and ability to be toxic, so by no means am I saying to cut off everyone in your life who has a toxic trait. I am saying that surrounding yourself with people who are working toward change, or people who have the traits that you aspire to have can be helpful and motivating.
Be patient with yourself.
Making changes within yourself is no easy task. It takes time to unlearn toxic traits and then adopt healthier ones. Be patient and kind with yourself as you go through the process of change.