6 Tips for Letting Go of Toxic Traits

6 Tips for Letting Go of Toxic Traits

Be honest with yourself about what your toxic traits are.

Having an awareness and being honest about when you’re being toxic is an important first step for change. The more aware you are, the better your chances of making active change. Let’s say for example that one of your toxic traits is gossiping about others, and maybe you have done it for so long that you don’t even realize when you’re doing it. If you find yourself gossiping about someone and you’re able to say in that moment “I’m being toxic right now”, you immediately give yourself the opportunity to stop. 

Examine and challenge your negative core beliefs.

Core beliefs are the central ideas that we have about ourselves and the world around us. Negative core beliefs have a huge influence on what we do, how we feel, and what we think. One example of a negative core belief is “I can’t trust others”. If this is a belief that you have deep-down, then you may push people away or assume the worst in people. You could challenge this belief by; thinking of times that someone in your life proved to be trustworthy, thinking about how this belief has negatively affected your relationships, and thinking about what relationships could be like if you chose to adopt a healthier belief. 

Write affirmations that reflect the healthy traits you aspire to have. 

I am a huge believer in writing out affirmations as a means of manifesting. If one of your toxic traits is being passive aggressive, then write “I am an assertive communicator” or “I am comfortable with speaking up”. Don’t forget to post your affirmations somewhere you can see them daily. 

Consider talking to a therapist or life coach. 

A therapist or life coach is someone that can provide support, encouragement, and guidance on your journey to healthy change. Making change all on your own could possibly be overwhelming, so it’s nice to have someone outside of your friends and family to get assistance from.

Surround yourself with people who are also working toward healthy change.  

We all have the capacity and ability to be toxic, so by no means am I saying to cut off everyone in your life who has a toxic trait. I am saying that surrounding yourself with people who are working toward change, or people who have the traits that you aspire to have can be helpful and motivating. 

Be patient with yourself.

Making changes within yourself is no easy task. It takes time to unlearn toxic traits and then adopt healthier ones. Be patient and kind with yourself as you go through the process of change. 

My Super Simple SkinCare Routine

So, before I get into my routine and the products I use, let me just give you a little back-ground story on my skin and how it has been lately…

In May of this year I stopped taking birth control simply because I had been on it for a few years and wanted to give my body a break. I figured there would be changes, like changes in my mood, but what I did not expect was a whole lot of acne. When I tell y’all I was HURT!!! My forehead broke out badly! I was getting pimples on places like my cheeks, chin, and nose! I probably sound hella dramatic cause it’s just acne right, but at the time it was a huge deal. I felt extremely unattractive and annoyed about it for weeks. Prior to stopping the birth-control I got like one pimple on my forehead every so often but that was it.

I read online that it was very normal to experience acne after quitting birth control because your hormones are adjusting. More specifically as your hormones adjust, oil production can increase.  After reading that information, I felt a lot better and I came to the realization that I just needed to be patient with my body. Also, having acne is not the end of the freaking world.

Now we get to the point of the post… my skin care routine!

As my skin was changing I thought it would be helpul to change some of the products I had been using. Some of these products are old, but some are newer as I’ve been using them for a little over a month now. I’m very happy to say that my skin is getting back to being clear and my confidence is on 10.

Step 1: Cleanser

My cleanser was the first product that I looked to change. I was previously using Cetaphil but now I use Acure-Seriously Soothing Cleansing Cream and Neutrogena- Pore Refining Exfoliating Cleanser. I love the cleansing cream because it leaves my face feeling both clean and hydrated. I do not use the exfoliating cleanser everyday although the directions state you can. It’s more like every other day in order to remove dead skin cells. While I’m cleansing I like to use the Beyond Belief- Deep Cleansing Silicone brush.

Step 2: Toner

I’ve been using Heritage Store- Rosewater Facial Toner for about 6 months now and will continue to do so because I am completley obsessed. I’m 99% sure that this product is the reason my skin tone is even. It’s also very hydrating.

Step 3: Eyecream

I’ve tried so many different eye creams over the past year, but about 3 months ago I found the  Belif-Moisturizing Eye Bomb and love it. I can’t stand dry under eyes, and this product is very hydrating.

Step 4: Moisturizer

I was previously using an Aveeno moisturizer, but noticed it was way too heavy for my skin now that it was producing more oil. I wanted something light, so I got the Cerave- Ultra Light Moisturizing Lotion. I love that such a light-weight product can be so moisturizing. It’s also non-comedogenic which means it doesn’t clog your pores.

I also want to mention the Ancient Healing Clay-Deep Facial Cleanser although this is something I use only once a week. When I do use it, I use it after cleansing. This product is great for pulling out any dirt and oil that is deep in your pores.

Additional skin-care tips…

Stay hydrated. Take your vitamins. Use sunscreen (yes, even us melanin infused folks need to use sunscreen).